Stuck in the '70s

Friday, December 10, 2004

Good Lord -- What a Year!

Wow. I've always heard that the Lord won't dish you out any more than He thinks you can handle. Now, what I'd like to know is: Just how much does He think I can handle? And, if that's true ... why do people have nervous breakdowns? And, what exactly IS a nervous breakdown? And, why haven't I had one yet? I'm getting tired of being "the strong one."

Last Sunday, my husband of seven months moved out of the house. Geeze. There's a new record for the Fidler family. One I'm sure not proud of, and one I'm bound to be stinging over for a while to come. I REALLY wanted it to work out, and I'm sure he did as well. I don't guess we really realized just how fundamentally different we are until we'd been together in the same dwelling for awhile. Each of us tried to change and tried to change the other, and it would have never worked. I was divorced (legally) from March 1995 through May 1, 2004, and most of that time, I was very happy as a single mom. However, I've always been looking for that perfect puzzle piece to fit right in there and be a part of our happy family. Apparently, this fella was not the right piece. Oh, I don't feel like it at the moment, but I'm sure I'll always be looking for that piece. Before plugging this last one in, I thought I was certain. I thought it was one of those "meant to be" soulmate kind of things. Is there such a thing? I realize two people have to work hard to make a marriage work. We both said we were willing to work hard, but it seems now that there are things that just cannot be fixed, and I guess it's better we call it quits before it gets worse. Next time, however, (IF there is a next time), I'm going to fashion a quiz.

My dad is doing great. He drove this week for the first time since before his surgery and is getting around quite well. His spirits are much improved, and he's looking forward to when my brother moves in with him this coming February.

The tree is up. The new furnace is installed. The cats have been de-fleaed. The cheeseball ingredients have been bought. And we're almost ready for the holidays and winter. The presents under the tree have still not appeared, but that will happen in small doses.

The Web site will grow this holiday season as I'll have time to myself on my hands. The Buck Rogers DVD contest has drawn quite a few entries, and more contests are coming. Please feel free to write me at with your ideas, suggestions and comments.

Meanwhile, I hope you have a great holiday season. If you have a significant other and children and parents, please remember how special they are. Tell them or show them you love them; and above all, be kind.